Maybe this is obvious to you already...but this is interesting and worth a read! I'm not sure if this guy, Sean Adam Smith is Christian hmm..

"Marriage Isn’t For You"

Having been married only a year and a half, I’ve recently come to the conclusion that marriage isn’t for me.

Now before you start making assumptions, keep reading.

I met my wife in high school when we were 15 years old. We were friends for ten years until…until we decided no longer wanted to be just friends. :) I strongly recommend that best friends fall in love. Good times will be had by all.

Nevertheless, falling in love with my best friend did not prevent me from having certain fears and anxieties about getting married. The nearer Kim and I approached the decision to marry, the more I was filled with a paralyzing fear. Was I ready? Was I making the right choice? Was Kim the right person to marry? Would she make me happy?

Then, one fateful night, I shared these thoughts and concerns with my dad.

Perhaps each of us have moments in our lives when it feels like time slows down or the air becomes still and everything around us seems to draw in, marking that moment as one we will never forget.

My dad giving his response to my concerns was such a moment for me. With a knowing smile he said, “Seth, you’re being totally selfish. So I’m going to make this really simple: marriage isn’t for you. You don’t marry to make yourself happy, you marry to make someone else happy. More than that, your marriage isn’t for yourself, you’re marrying for a family. Not just for the in-laws and all of that nonsense, but for your future children. Who do you want to help you raisethem? Who do you want to influence them? Marriage isn’t for you. It’s not about you. Marriage is about the person you married.”

It was in that very moment that I knew that Kim was the right person to marry. I realized that I wanted to make her happy; to see her smile every day, to make her laugh every day. I wanted to be a part of her family, and my family wanted her to be a part of ours. And thinking back on all the times I had seen her play with my nieces, I knew that she was the one with whom I wanted to build our own family.

My father’s advice was both shocking and revelatory. It went against the grain of today’s “Walmart philosophy”, which is if it doesn’t make you happy, you can take it back and get a new one.

No, a true marriage (and true love) is never about you. It’s about the person you love—their wants, their needs, their hopes, and their dreams. Selfishness demands, “What’s in it for me?”, while Love asks, “What can I give?”

Some time ago, my wife showed me what it means to love selflessly. For many months, my heart had been hardening with a mixture of fear and resentment. Then, after the pressure had built up to where neither of us could stand it, emotions erupted. I was callous. I was selfish.

But instead of matching my selfishness, Kim did something beyond wonderful—she showed an outpouring of love. Laying aside all of the pain and anguish I had caused her, she lovingly took me in her arms and soothed my soul.

Marriage is about family.

I realized that I had forgotten my dad’s advice. While Kim’s side of the marriage had been to love me, my side of the marriage had become all about me. This awful realization brought me to tears, and I promised my wife that I would try to be better.

To all who are reading this article—married, almost married, single, or even the sworn bachelor or bachelorette—I want you to know that marriage isn’t for you. No true relationship of love is for you. Love is about the person you love.

And, paradoxically, the more you truly love that person, the more love you receive. And not just from your significant other, but from their friends and their family and thousands of others you never would have met had your love remained self-centered.

Truly, love and marriage isn’t for you. It’s for others.

http://sethadamsmith.com/2013/11/02/marriage-isnt-for-you/

Renewed love?

This is a stereotypical "timeline" of a relationship..

What do you think of stage 4?

So my question is, what do you think about daily renewed love? 

Do you think it's possible to never hit their depiction of stage 4?

Is it possible to make the effort to love someone anew every day... 

TO PURSUE YOU EVERY DAY?

The way that God pursues you every day?

Happiness

Check out this video

"Scientists Discover One Of The Greatest Contributing Factors To Happiness"

Forgiving

uncle in Toronto

toronto trip was good.

my mum, sister and I stayed with aunt and uncle (my mum's cousin) and 3 kids aged 11 13 and 16.

They treat us really very well..you can really tell when someone truly loves you, they really want to spend time with you bc time is the most expensive commodity. My uncle always tells my sister and I to visit, to stay longer with them..I feel like he sees us like his own daughters. He knows my dad was never around. In fact, his dad was never around either. As a result....he has never spent a single night away from his family. He refuses to go on business trips unless he can bring his family..or he'll only go to the closer ones where he can go home at night. He is a PT and owned 4 clinics, teaches at McMaster university. They found out my aunt had cancer and he sold 3 of his 4 clinics so he could spend more time with family. 

Part of me is envious, i wish my dad was like that, i wish it were my family. 

Not only was my dad not teaching us what a father should be teaching his children, he wasnt even THERE, he didnt even give that a chance. Parents have the biggest impact in a child's life. For one, they have a huge impact on their children's view of themselves.  Someone who cannot manage his household well cannot expect to do great things outside, it starts at home. 

I am however more hopeful than envious. I see my uncle and I know there are good men out there. 

Faith

Pain

I've been recently learning that pain is pain...it is felt the same way by everyone everywhere, just originating from different sources.

A child drops his ice cream cone and cries. This is the same pain that is felt by someone who lost an arm.

Someone who losses someone to death and someone who losses someone from a heart break experience the same pain. I'm crying the same way about a heart break as I was crying over the death of a friend last week. It is the same heart wrenching feeling, that brings overwhelming sadness...

I remember the day my first pet gold fish died...I sat on my mom's lap and cried with all my might, just cried because I lost something very dear to me. I made it a tomb in my backyard and I would go visit it often when I was young. Isn't it weird how pain is felt the same, throughout the different ages and phases in life?

I've been told before that I'm very understanding..."you are beyond understanding, you understand when there is no understanding" I've been told..

I've been learning that I don't understand pain. I will never understand pain, why it is, and how it is goes away..or is masked with time. I'm learning that sometimes, there is no understanding at all. There is no understanding of why someone would walk into a school and shoot children, no understanding why the father of two young lovely boys was taken away so early, why 19 firefighters died in a wild fire because the wind suddenly changed directions.


Revelation 21:1-4
Then I saw “a new heaven and a new earth,”[a] for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea. 2 I saw the Holy City, the new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride beautifully dressed for her husband. 3 And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, “Look! God’s dwelling place is now among the people, and he will dwell with them. They will be his people, and God himself will be with them and be their God. 4 ‘He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death’[b] or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.”

Story of Zach Sobiech

Charlie Todd: The shared experience of absurdity

Brené Brown: Listening to shame

Rita Pierson: Every kid needs a champion

Oftentimes...

...songs not only sing to you (euh...) but speaks to you directly. Right there.

Satisfied In You

I have lost my appetite /And a flood is welling up behind my eyes/ So I eat the tears I cry/ And if that were not enough/ They know just the words to cut and tear and prod/ When they ask me “Whereʼs your God?”/ Why are you downcast, oh my soul?/ Why so disturbed within me?/ I can remember when you showed your face to me/ As a deer pants for water so my soul thirsts for you/ And when I behold your glory/ You so faithfully renew/ Like a bed of rest for my fainting flesh/ I am satisfied in you/ When Iʼm staring at the ground/ Itʼs an inbred feedback loop that brings me down/ So itʼs time to lift my brow/ And remember better days/ When I loved to worship you in all your ways/ With the sweetest songs of praise/ Why are you downcast oh my soul?/ Why so disturbed within me?/ I can remember when you showed your grace to me/ As a deer pants for water so my soul thirsts for you/ And when I survey your splendour/ You so faithfully renew Like a bed of rest for my fainting flesh/ I am satisfied in you/ Let my sighs give way to songs that sing about your faithfulness/ Let my pain reveal your glory as my only real rest/ Let my losses show me all I truly have is you/ Cause all I truly have is you/ So when Iʼm drowning out at sea/ And your breakers and your waves crash down on me/ Iʼll recall your safety scheme/ Youʼre the one who made the waves/ And your Son went out to suffer in my place/ And to tell me that Iʼm safe/ Why am I down? Why so disturbed?/ I am satisfied in you

The story of Ian and Larissa

Desert Song

sometimes...when we don't feel like worshiping...
very touching story

Refiner of Silver

There was a group of women in a Bible study on the book of Malachi. As they were studying chapter three, they came across verse three, which says: “He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver.” This verse puzzled the women and they wondered what this statement meant about the character and nature of God. One of the women offered to find out about the process of refining silver and get back to the group at their next Bible study.

That week this woman called up a silversmith and made an appointment to watch him at work. She didn’t mention anything about the reason for her interest in silver beyond her curiosity about the process of refining silver. As she watched the silversmith; he held a piece of silver over the fire and let it heat up. He explained that in refining silver, one needed to hold the silver in the middle of the fire where the flames were hottest as to burn away all the impurities.

The woman thought about God holding us in such a hot spot – then she thought again about the verse, that he sits as a refiner and purifier of silver She asked the silversmith if it was true that he had to sit there in front of the fire the whole time the silver was being refined.

The man answered “yes”, he not only had to sit there holding the silver, but he had to keep his eyes on the silver the entire time it was in the fire. If the silver was left even a moment too long in the flames, it would be destroyed.

The woman was silent for a moment. Then she asked the silversmith, “How do you know when the silver is fully refined?”

He smiled at her and answered, “Oh, that’s easy. When I see my image in it.”

If today you are feeling the heat of this world’s fire, just remember that God has His eyes on you.

“He will sit as a refiner and purifier of silver.” (Malachi 3:3)

Luke 7:1-10

The Faith of the Centurion

7 When Jesus had finished saying all this to the people who were listening, he entered Capernaum.² There a centurion’s servant, whom his master valued highly, was sick and about to die. ³ The centurion heard of Jesus and sent some elders of the Jews to him, asking him to come and heal his servant. ⁴ When they came to Jesus, they pleaded earnestly with him, “This man deserves to have you do this, ⁵ because he loves our nation and has built our synagogue.” ⁶ So Jesus went with them.

He was not far from the house when the centurion sent friends to say to him: “Lord, don’t trouble yourself, for I do not deserve to have you come under my roof. ⁷ That is why I did not even consider myself worthy to come to you. But say the word, and my servant will be healed. ⁸ For I myself am a man under authority, with soldiers under me. I tell this one, ‘Go,’ and he goes; and that one, ‘Come,’ and he comes. I say to my servant, ‘Do this,’ and he does it.”
⁹ When Jesus heard this, he was amazed at him, and turning to the crowd following him, he said, “I tell you, I have not found such great faith even in Israel.” ¹⁰ Then the men who had been sent returned to the house and found the servant well.

Luke 6:37-49

Judging Others

³⁷ “Judge not, and you will not be judged; condemn not, and you will not be condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven; ³⁸ give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you.”
³⁹ He also told them a parable: “Can a blind man lead a blind man? Will they not both fall into a pit? ⁴⁰ A disciple is not above his teacher, but everyone when he is fully trained will be like his teacher. ⁴¹ Why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? ⁴² How can you say to your brother, ‘Brother, let me take out the speck that is in your eye,’ when you yourself do not see the log that is in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take out the speck that is in your brother's eye.

A Tree and Its Fruit

⁴³ “For no good tree bears bad fruit, nor again does a bad tree bear good fruit, ⁴⁴ for each tree is known by its own fruit. For figs are not gathered from thornbushes, nor are grapes picked from a bramble bush. ⁴⁵ The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.

Build Your House on the Rock

⁴⁶ “Why do you call me ‘Lord, Lord,’ and not do what I tell you? ⁴⁷ Everyone who comes to me and hears my words and does them, I will show you what he is like: ⁴⁸ he is like a man building a house, who dug deep and laid the foundation on the rock. And when a flood arose, the stream broke against that house and could not shake it, because it had been well built.^{[c] 49} But the one who hears and does not do them is like a man who built a house on the ground without a foundation. When the stream broke against it, immediately it fell, and the ruin of that house was great.”

Luke 6: 12-36

The Twelve Apostles

¹² In these days he went out to the mountain to pray, and all night he continued in prayer to God. ¹³ And when day came, he called his disciples and chose from them twelve, whom he named apostles: ¹⁴ Simon, whom he named Peter, and Andrew his brother, and James and John, and Philip, and Bartholomew, ¹⁵ and Matthew, and Thomas, and James the son of Alphaeus, and Simon who was called the Zealot, ¹⁶ and Judas the son of James, and Judas Iscariot, who became a traitor.

Jesus Ministers to a Great Multitude

¹⁷ And he came down with them and stood on a level place, with a great crowd of his disciples and a great multitude of people from all Judea and Jerusalem and the seacoast of Tyre and Sidon, ¹⁸ who came to hear him and to be healed of their diseases. And those who were troubled with unclean spirits were cured. ¹⁹ And all the crowd sought to touch him, for power came out from him and healed them all.

The Beatitudes

²⁰ And he lifted up his eyes on his disciples, and said:
“Blessed are you who are poor, for yours is the kingdom of God.
²¹ “Blessed are you who are hungry now, for you shall be satisfied.
“Blessed are you who weep now, for you shall laugh.
²² “Blessed are you when people hate you and when they exclude you and revile you and spurn your name as evil, on account of the Son of Man! ²³ Rejoice in that day, and leap for joy, for behold, your reward is great in heaven; for so their fathers did to the prophets.

Jesus Pronounces Woes

²⁴ “But woe to you who are rich, for you have received your consolation.
²⁵ “Woe to you who are full now, for you shall be hungry.
“Woe to you who laugh now, for you shall mourn and weep.
²⁶ “Woe to you, when all people speak well of you, for so their fathers did to the false prophets.

Love Your Enemies

²⁷ “But I say to you who hear, Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, ²⁸ bless those who curse you, pray for those who abuse you. ²⁹ To one who strikes you on the cheek, offer the other also, and from one who takes away your cloak do not withhold your tunic^[b] either. ³⁰ Give to everyone who begs from you, and from one who takes away your goods do not demand them back. ³¹ And as you wish that others would do to you, do so to them.
³² “If you love those who love you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. ³³ And if you do good to those who do good to you, what benefit is that to you? For even sinners do the same. ³⁴ And if you lend to those from whom you expect to receive, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, to get back the same amount. ³⁵ But love your enemies, and do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return, and your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, for he is kind to the ungrateful and the evil. ³⁶ Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful.

Luke 6:1-11

Jesus Is Lord of the Sabbath

6 On a Sabbath,^[a] while he was going through the grainfields, his disciples plucked and ate some heads of grain, rubbing them in their hands. ² But some of the Pharisees said, “Why are you doing what is not lawful to do on the Sabbath?” ³ And Jesus answered them, “Have you not read what David did when he was hungry, he and those who were with him: ⁴ how he entered the house of God and took and ate the bread of the Presence, which is not lawful for any but the priests to eat, and also gave it to those with him?” ⁵ And he said to them, “The Son of Man is lord of the Sabbath.”

A Man with a Withered Hand

⁶ On another Sabbath, he entered the synagogue and was teaching, and a man was there whose right hand was withered. ⁷ And the scribes and the Pharisees watched him, to see whether he would heal on the Sabbath, so that they might find a reason to accuse him. ⁸ But he knew their thoughts, and he said to the man with the withered hand, “Come and stand here.” And he rose and stood there. ⁹ And Jesus said to them, “I ask you, is it lawful on the Sabbath to do good or to do harm, to save life or to destroy it?” ¹⁰ And after looking around at them all he said to him, “Stretch out your hand.” And he did so, and his hand was restored. ¹¹ But they were filled with fury and discussed with one another what they might do to Jesus.

Luke 5:17-39

Jesus Heals a Paralytic

¹⁷ On one of those days, as he was teaching, Pharisees and teachers of the law were sitting there, who had come from every village of Galilee and Judea and from Jerusalem. And the power of the Lord was with him to heal.^{[d] 18}  And behold, some men were bringing on a bed a man who was paralyzed, and they were seeking to bring him in and lay him before Jesus, ¹⁹ but finding no way to bring him in, because of the crowd, they went up on the roof and let him down with his bed through the tiles into the midst before Jesus. ²⁰ And when he saw their faith, he said, “Man, your sins are forgiven you.” ²¹ And the scribes and the Pharisees began to question, saying, “Who is this who speaks blasphemies? Who can forgive sins but God alone?” ²² When Jesus perceived their thoughts, he answered them, “Why do you question in your hearts? ²³ Which is easier, to say, ‘Your sins are forgiven you,’ or to say, ‘Rise and walk’? ²⁴ But that you may know that the Son of Man has authority on earth to forgive sins”—he said to the man who was paralyzed—“I say to you, rise, pick up your bed and go home.” ²⁵ And immediately he rose up before them and picked up what he had been lying on and went home, glorifying God. ²⁶ And amazement seized them all, and they glorified God and were filled with awe, saying, “We have seen extraordinary things today.”

Jesus Calls Levi

²⁷  After this he went out and saw a tax collector named Levi, sitting at the tax booth. And he said to him, “Follow me.” ²⁸ And leaving everything, he rose and followed him.
²⁹ And Levi made him a great feast in his house, and there was a large company of tax collectors and others reclining at table with them. ³⁰ And the Pharisees and their scribes grumbled at his disciples, saying, “Why do you eat and drink with tax collectors and sinners?” ³¹ And Jesus answered them, “Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. ³²  I have not come to call the righteous but sinners to repentance.”

A Question About Fasting

³³ And they said to him, “The disciples of John fast often and offer prayers, and so do the disciples of the Pharisees, but yours eat and drink.” ³⁴ And Jesus said to them, “Can you make wedding guests fast while the bridegroom is with them? ³⁵  The days will come when the bridegroom is taken away from them, and then they will fast in those days.” ³⁶ He also told them a parable: “No one tears a piece from a new garment and puts it on an old garment. If he does, he will tear the new, and the piece from the new will not match the old. ³⁷ And no one puts new wine into old wineskins. If he does, the new wine will burst the skins and it will be spilled, and the skins will be destroyed. ³⁸ But new wine must be put into fresh wineskins. ³⁹ And no one after drinking old wine desires new, for he says, ‘The old is good.’”^[e]